I just got blindsided by an email that I received. I want to write about it, and don't think she reads this, but can't be sure. How frustrating is this? Anyone who knows me knows that I have to work through things by writing them down or talking about them, but I don't feel that I can't. Guess I'll go watch some trashy TV or do some schoolwork to take my mind off it.
I have reached maximum stress level, and am going to blow at any moment. 2008 has not been the best year for us, with two of Darren's aunts dying, another one having a debilitating stroke, and another one with a weird stomach ailment that could end up being really dangerous. Besides those things, Darren totaled his paid-for car and we had to buy a new one, I didn't get my dream job and quit teaching to go back to school, we've had to pay for surgeries for Zoe and me, we now have three friends/family members who are going through a divorce, our roof is leaking into the wall of our garage, I have no money to buy Christmas presents, and tonight, Darren's car was broken into. He was in Houston at a bar with his co-workers, and someone smashed the right rear window and took out his laptop bag. On his laptop was all of his work for the past 18 months, some of which are projects which are due next week. He also had a brand-new external hard drive that he had gotten today, all of his business cards and those of his contacts, and his house keys.
So, it looks like we will be getting the locks changed on our house tomorrow, and hopefully having the window replaced in the car. I don't know what he will be able to do about his computer; hopefully they will buy him another one. Darren called the police, but they won't go there. There have been a rash of burglaries in the area lately, and nothing is being done about them.
I am beginning to wonder if it was worth it to quit my job and go back to school. I hate that I have put us in such a terrible financial bind, and it's only going to get worse. If I get into nursing school, I won't be able to work at all for the next two years. I can't imagine going back to teaching, or working full-time again, but that may end up having to happen. The only other solution I can see would be to sell my car, since it is the most expensive bill we have. If I could come up with some other way to bring in money, I would. The problem is that I don't have time to work more; I already don't have enough time to devote to my online classes. I don't sleep enough, can't keep up with the house, and always feel like I am behind on everything.
The semester ends December 9th. It can't come fast enough for me! I won't be enjoying paid time off this year for the holidays, and will have to pay for Zoe's spot at the daycare that she is going to as of December 1st.
I think this post is depressing enough. I'll write more when I have a more positive outlook on things.
This is turning out to be a long week already. Zoe is cutting teeth, and is absolutely miserable. She is not sleeping well, and has been having some stomach issues, as well.
I am trying to get ahead on my online classwork so there is not so much left to do this weekend, but I am not sure if that is going to happen.
I'm tired, and have a sinus infection. I went to the ENT today, and he suctioned out my sinuses. I thought my teeth were going to come out. It was not fun.
I have too many responsibilities for Cub Scouts. I am coordinating our pack's popcorn sale, which includes sitting in front of stores and selling, and also placing the order and picking it up in a few weeks. I am also in charge of our pack's rechartering right now, which makes sure we have an accurate roster, and that everyone pays dues for next year.
I have to focus on the fact that I finish school for the semester December 9th, and rechartering is over December 11th. I can make it, I hope. I am only taking two classes in the spring, but they are both supposed to be hard. Joy.
We are heading to Lafayette for a few days for Thanksgiving, and that will probably be our last trip over there for the year. I hate that we don't go as often as we used to, but it's so much harder with two kids, and it seems like we have more obligations on the weekends than we used to. We're going to stay home for Christmas, and go down to Galveston for the day to Darren's dad's house. I am trying to think of creative, low-cost gifts for Christmas, since funds are tight this year. Hmm, Cub Scout popcorn?
We didn't do anything too terribly exciting this weekend. I spent all of Friday at the Nutcracker Market, which was bigger than I could ever imagine. I didn't eat lunch, because I ate enough free samples of candy, salsa, and other things to fill me up. I got a call while I was there that our popcorn to sell had come in to the BSA office, so I left Reliant Park and drove an hour to the office to get the popcorn. Two and a half hours after I left the Nutcracker Market, the popcorn and I arrived at home. We ordered pizza that night, and I crashed.
Yesterday, we got up and Zach and I went to a local family-owned grocery store to work a two-hour shift selling popcorn. It was cold, and there wasn't much traffic, but it was fun. Between the three boys who worked yesterday, we sold $297 of popcorn and got over $36 in donations. Next week will be much better, because we will be at a much busier store. I have almost $2000 of popcorn still to sell, which makes me nervous.
After our sale, we came home and cleaned up around the house. Zach had a friend over to play later in the evening (wow, were they busy!), then we took the boys to Market Street to eat dinner. Before dinner, we drove around and located where the ice skating rink and light display are going to be, and we made the boys run down the Woodlands Waterway from the Pavilion to Town Green Park. Amazingly enough, they were well-behaved and sat through dinner. Afterward, we went to take the friend home, and Zach ended up staying the night. What did Darren and I do for fun? We put Zoe to bed and I worked on schoolwork until the screen went blurry.
This morning, we woke up and started to clean. We realized that the dryer is not heating, which is not fun, considering the mountain of dirty laundry that I have. That wouldn't be too bad, except that I have bedding that Zoe wet on, and clothes that she vomited on today. Nice.
We visited Wally World this afternoon for our groceries, then I hit the books. I just finished all of my online coursework for the week, and need to study for my anatomy and physiology test tomorrow on the lymphatic system, immunity, and the respiratory system. No TV for me tonight.
I missed posting yesterday. After doing a couple of hours of schoolwork after coming home yesterday, I was too mentally tired to do anymore. So, I took the evening off to eat pizza and watch TV with the family. Today is payback day.
After working all day, I came home to finish chapter review questions in anatomy and physiology. I just finished those, and still need to finish the rough draft of my research paper for tomorrow. Unfortunately, something in me won't let me do that. I just don't want to do this! I have a test this weekend in that same class, plus tons of work to complete for two of my online classes that are due Sunday evening. Tomorrow night, I have a Cub Scout district meeting, and Friday, I am going to the Nutcracker Market in Houston. I'll study sometime...
I am going to now chain myself to Microsoft Word until something about omphalitis comes out. See you tomorrow!
It's going to take a lot to get me through the next four weeks. I feel like I am tired all the time, and I feel guilty doing anything that does not relate to school. Will someone remind me why quitting my job and putting us in enormous debt so that I could go back to school for an entirely new career was a good idea? (Excuse me while I rest my weary head on the keyboard)
Here's what I am up against for tomorrow: 1. Take Zoe to the doctor at 8:15 to figure out why she has had diarrhea for the past week and seems to feel crappy 2. Try to go workout so that I can get my credit hours in...however, my ankle where I have tendinitis is really bothering me lately, and working out will make it worse. 3. Study for a quiz on the respiratory system, a chapter I have not looked at yet. And, probably work on my chapter review questions, since I have a test this weekend. 4. Rough draft of my research paper is not due until Thursday. Thank God for that!
Really far down the list: wash clothes, clean house, watch TV
As the weekend comes to a close, I am feeling fairly good about what I accomplished. I managed to finish all of my schoolwork except for the rough draft of my research paper (I'm working on it now) and the review questions for anatomy (I'm getting there). Yesterday, we went swingset shopping and concluded that we will be buying a kit from Home Depot and building our own. Rainbow Play Systems has some really nice ones, but way out of our price range.
While out and about, we rented Kung Fu Panda. Last night, we ate leftover gumbo, watched Kung Fu Panda (really cute), and I baked pumpkin cheesecake squares, which were really good. While watching the movie, I worked on my anatomy review questions, and stayed up until 2:00.
Today, Zoe woke me up at 8:00, and we sat on the couch while Zach watched Kung Fu Panda a couple of times. Darren woke up and cooked our traditional Sunday breakfast of bacon, egg, and cheese tacos, then Zachary left to go to lunch and to see High School Musical 3. While he was gone, we pulled out the carpet (!) that was in our laundry room and cleaned the linoleum that was underneath it. Darren managed to switch the position of the washer and dryer for me, which I am really excited about.
Zachary returned home just in time to leave for a birthday party, and while he was there, I went to the mall to see what Hallmark had going on this weekend. I made a few holiday purchases, then went back to pick Zachary up.
This evening, we watched the Amazing Race, Zoe had a poopy accident all over her Exersaucer, and I have been working on my research paper. Guess what I'll be doing tomorrow night, since my rough draft is due Tuesday?
I'm off to bed so that I can have the energy to chase preschoolers around tomorrow.
I just realized today exactly how much schoolwork I have hanging over my head at the moment. If you haven't figured it out yet, I process information by writing it out. My favorite thing to do is to write lists and cross things off as I do them. Thanks, Mom!
Here's what I have to do right now:
In Psychology, come up with a research paper topic and write that paper before December 1st In Kinesiology, somehow make my 30 workout hours for the semester (HA!) and take two more chapter quizzes In Speech (just started Sunday) by Sunday at midnight, read one more chapter, take the quiz, and write a journal entry In Anatomy and Physiology (the class I have to make an A in to get into nursing school) finish my research and write a rough draft of my research paper to turn in Tuesday ( a rough draft? seriously? I don't do rough drafts!), study for a quiz that we will have Tuesday on material I haven't read yet, complete three chapters' worth of review questions, and study for a test next weekend
In Cub Scouts, I have to go to training Thursday night for our annual rechartering (no clue), then I have a month to make sure that everyone is registered properly, all of the leaders are trained, we have medical forms on everyone, and everyone registers again for next year. Then, I have to find volunteers to run our Pinewood Derby in January. We are still recruiting and getting new members to start attending meetings, and the year is halfway over. Ike sure screwed things up for us this fall!
Apparently I am hosting a baby shower at my former school with some of my former colleagues after school on Thursday. I haven't been invited yet, but I am sure I will be assigned some duties and told that I am going in on a gift with some other people. Should I approach them, or wait until they remember to invite me? It could get interesting, but I don't want the new mom to think that I don't want to help. I told them that I didn't have time to do anything besides show up and maybe help do some decorating. I can't contribute financially to this, and I don't feel like I should have to, since the school is throwing the shower.
My hands hurt from typing, so it must be time for bed. Any volunteers to come and clean my house? Anyone want to volunteer for the Pinewood Derby? Anyone?
At least my job is easy. That must be why I make no money!
Every time I read this blog, my heart goes out to this family. I don't know that I could be as strong as they are! It really makes me appreciate having my healthy little girl, and I give her an extra big hug after reading every post. Today would have been Baby Cate's first birthday, and they are having to make it through the day without her. Wow.
The Cantrells are an amazing family, and even though I don't know them personally, I do know some people who do know them, and they are from the same area that I am. I guess that's why they touched me so much.
I missed a day of posting yesterday, but had a very good reason. Zoe brought home a stomach virus Tuesday from her babysitter's house, threw up Tuesday night, and I was feeling awful by that evening. Zoe slept for about 18 hours, was awake for a couple of hours, then slept again most of the day yesterday. Zachary woke up and threw up all over his room yesterday morning at 5:00, then spent the morning in bed.
Of course, I got the virus, but never had the relief of throwing up. The kids are both better today, but I am still feeling yucky, and still can't eat anything besides Saltines and applesauce. They both went to school/the sitter, and I am going to stay in bed until I feel better.
My mom is having knee surgery this morning, and I hope it goes well for her. I wish I could be there to help her, but I would be useless at this point.
All I can say is, thank God it happened. We need this change, badly. I am sure that most of my family will now disown me for publicly speaking out about my opinion on this election, but I've done worse things.
For those who are afraid that Obama is secretly evil and is plotting bad things, remember the system of checks and balances that we have in place. Each of the three branches of government is there to ensure that neither of the others gets too powerful. Congress and the Supreme Court won't let Obama do anything too wild.
On a completely different note, I will be staying home from work tomorrow with a sick baby. She was cranky all day, and threw up this evening. She went to bed at 6:30, and I haven't heard from her since. I am sure she won't make it through the night, though. Tomorrow, Darren actually has to go into Houston for the first time in a couple of weeks, so I will lose 6 of my 12 hours of work this week. I miss my teacher salary right now, especially with the upcoming holidays. Presents will be inexpensive this year!
My 14-year-old cat has been diagnosed with hyperthyroidism, so Darren has to go to a veterinary pharmacy in Houston tomorrow and pick up his thyroid medicine. It's an ointment that we rub on his ears. The vet is worried that treating his thyroid will cause him to go into kidney failure, so we have him on a low protein diet that will be easier on his kidneys. So far, his kidney and liver functions look good, and he'll have blood work done again in 60 days. Doing cat dissection the past couple of weeks has really gotten to me, and I hope that Chance will be with us for at least a few more years.
My third online class started today, and it seems like it is going to be a lot of work, since it is only a five-week class. I need to make sure I do well in it, and start spending more time doing work for my other classes. This semester, my grades are so important, and I feel like I have been in a schoolwork slump for the past couple of weeks. I need to snap out of that!
I am really enjoying all of the holidays so much this fall, and I realized it's because of my job. We spent a whole month celebrating Halloween, and doing related art projects, reading picture books, and listening to Halloween music. We visited a pumpkin patch, carved a pumpkin, and had a costume party. Can't do that in public school! For Thanksgiving, we are talking turkeys and leaves, and will have a Thanksgiving feast, complete with costumes. I can't wait! For Christmas, my class will be reindeer and sing "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer". It's so much fun to see these things through a preschooler's eyes, and if teaching were this much fun every year, I would have never left. I don't think I will get to do this past this year, though, unless I don't get into nursing school. Too bad.
Off to study for my lab practical tomorrow. It's on human and cat blood vessels, and won't be too bad, I hope.
I completely forgot to go back and post about our concert experience. We had a really good time. There were 9 of us who went together, and we all had shirts that someone made with one of the guys' pictures on it. Mine had Donnie, since that's who I liked way back when.
We left really early to head down to the Toyota Center, then waited in line to get in. Once we made it into the building, we ate some junk food and found our seats. They couldn't have been farther from the stage; we were directly across from the stage on the top row. Looking around, everyone was a woman around my age, some with their daughters. There were a few men in attendance, but I doubt that any of them were there on their own volition!
Some Jamaican rapper opened the show, then Natasha Beddingfield sang, who was really good. Once New Kids came on stage, the place was packed. They sang all of their old songs, plus some new ones. They still had all of their old dance moves, and have gotten better-looking with age.
Mom and Dad came in last weekend, and we took the kids to a pumpkin patch. It was way too hot for October, but we had a good time anyway. We actually had to pay admission to get in this place, and it was pretty crowded. After taking photos in a few different places, we took a "train ride" through the farm's Christmas tree fields (could this be so that kids will beg their parents to go back at Christmas time? hmmm). We didn't buy any pumpkins, since we already had two at home, but it was a nice setting for pictures.
I have decided to participate in NaBloPoMo, or National Blog Posting Month. I am hoping that it will help me to post more often, even if it is just pictures of my kids. I am always on the computer, so it shouldn't be too hard to click over here and write a few lines. It is nice to have a record of our lives, even if they are stressful and hectic most of the time. Zoe is growing and changing so fast right now, and Zachary is becoming more and more of a little man. So, let's see how this works. If you are reading this and want to join, click the box on the right side.
I feel like I have gotten so bad at posting lately that I have probably lost anyone who used to read this. I have tons of pictures to post, but I am having issues with my camera and my computer speaking to each other. I have almost 700 pictures on my camera, and they are about 3Mb apiece. My computer has about 6Gb of pictures on it already, so it either takes hours to upload photos, or iPhoto crashes completely. I guess I need to take some of the pictures off the computer and burn CDs. I'll get right on that, after I catch up on laundry, clean out the kids' rooms, and work ahead on my school work.
I can't imagine what I would do if I were working full time this year. I'm only working twelve hours a week at the preschool, and maybe spend an hour outside of work a week planning and gathering materials. I am taking eleven hours in school, and don't spend enough time prepping for class. My online psychology class has one or more quizzes or discussions due every week, and my online kinesiology class requires me to work out 30 hours on campus during the semester. I don't know if I'll make it. I have another online class starting in a couple of weeks, and still have my campus-based anatomy and physiology class for which I do a lot of work. Besides all that mess, I have more Cub Scout business to take care of than I ever thought humanly possible. Once popcorn sales end December 2nd, and rechartering ends December 11th, things should be better.
I am only taking two classes in the spring; a campus-based microbiology class, and an online pharmacology class. They both sound like a lot of work! I apply for nursing school in January, and hope for the best!
Back to Halloween, since that was my original intent...
Halloween is my favorite holiday, as anyone who knows me can tell you. It's just a magical night to me, and growing up, I had the greatest memories of going to haunted houses, trick or treating with my neighbors, and actually having a haunted house at our house. We would work for weeks to put them together, and the neighbors would all help. Sometimes they were in the garage, sometimes on the driveway. We did ones made out of cardboard, and out of black plastic. Once I graduated from high school and left home, the haunted houses stopped. Next year, Darren and I are bringing that tradition back. I need to reserve my dad now!
The reason we are adamant about this is that it seems like trick or treating is not as popular as it used to be. Many people opt for church "fall festivals" instead, or attending parties. We had very few kids come by last night as compared to previous years, and I don't want trick or treating to become obsolete. What's so bad about dressing up and ringing your neighbors' doorbells for them to give you candy?
Yesterday was not what I had planned. I spent two hours at the dentist having some fillings done, then took the cat to the vet to find out that his thyroid is hyperactive. I then went home and waited for Zach to get off the bus, and dressed the kids in their costumes to go trick or treating at our village's shopping center. That starts at 4:30, and it's important to get there right away and leave by 5:30, because it gets so crowded that you can't walk down the sidewalks. Each of the stores has someone sitting outside giving out candy, and there is a costume contest. It's a lot of fun, and a great way to start off the festivities. Zoe had her first lollipop, and she was in heaven! She dropped it on the ground, and I threw it away, and she didn't complain too much. It was her first candy experience, and I think she didn't know what to think.
After leaving there, we stopped at Taco Bell for dinner, and Zachary managed to spill my entire drink while still sitting in the drive thru. We went home, Darren cleaned out the car, and we ate dinner. We didn't leave to go trick or treating until about 7:00, because it wasn't dark yet, and we didn't see any kids out. Finally we decided to go, and there still weren't any kids walking around. We went with one of our neighbors, and we were the only ones on the street. Later, we did see a few more people, and the teenagers came out around 8:00, but it was disappointing. I wanted to get everyone together afterward last night, since it was a Friday night, but after walking around for over an hour, I decided against that.
Darren put Zoe to bed, then Zach and I sorted his candy and watched The Great Pumpkin. We watched Survivor after that, and I fell asleep before Tribal Council. Today, we are going to a craft fair at a local elementary school, a birthday party, and will take my car to be cleaned. I am hoping the house will get cleaned at some point, and I have a lab practical to study for on Tuesday.